Ouch

Funny thing that today I felt cranky for about an hour. Well, only an hour but enough to amaze me again. I have been able to control my emotion so far and today I lost it a bit but after that, it's under control again. Well one think its a good thing. But I'm curious, why is this happening?
Ok, first, the trigger was a call from an agent who told me the client rejected my application. Well, I was kinda expecting that, but maybe because the company is big local and project looks pretty good, I was hoping they could consider my application. So I was kinda furious a bit with the news. But I realized, He must have other plan. I know I will endup working. But where, when. Ok, one thing that I can't wait because that put me on hold to have a relationship with her.
Well, I know patience start running over me. But sometimes it breaks a bit of course.
I have to stay strong and win this battle which I am sure I will.

Second thing. It's so difficult for me to become active in this situation. I have set goals to achieve about 4 certifications within this 2 years (CPIM, PMI, Oracle, Java2) plus I am setting up my eyes upon another degree later on.
Looks pretty ambitious plan uh? Yeah but I have to be fruitful. I already promise that. I just need to start walking. Please all, push me, touch me, kick me to start study.

At the end, I am so thankful, that she stands by my side now. Not formally, I haven't heard about her decision, but I'm really confident this time. Anyway, she's really supportive to what I'm doing now, and she keeps reminding me to walk by His side. Thank you.